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Article appearing in The Gadsden Times (Gadsden, Alabama) Program seeks to help abuse victims The effects of sexual abuse know no time limit. Mental health experts agree it is not a problem time alone can heal. But Mary Kay tortoriello hopes to help victims in Gadsden move beyond that by offering "Shelter from the Storm." The 14-week program by Cynthia Kubetin and Dr. James Mallory is not a substitute for counseling, Kubetin writes, but a "Christ-centered caring and sharing" group designed to help people deal with the issues related to their experience of sexual abuse, including the fear, guilt, loneliness, forgiveness and confrontation. An orientation session for people interested in the program is from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. Friday at Bellevue United Methodist Church, where Tortoriello and her husband, John, have a counseling practice. "The orientation is about awareness," Tortoriello said. There, she will discuss the things that happen in a family that has experienced sexual abuse and the signs of abuse at different stages of life. Educational materials will be available. She will neet one-on-one with everyone who wants to commit to the 14-week program to help determine if it is right for the person. Some people may be at a stage where individual counseling, psychiatric help or even more intensive treatment for depression, anxiety or addiction is more appropriate. "Shelter" is the first program of its kind in the Gadsden area, Tortoriello said, and she admits survivors may be reluctant to attend. "Nobody wants to be known as a victim," she said. Tortoriello has treated many sexual abuse survivors in her 20 years as a counselor in Florida and more since moving three years ago to Gadsden. She believes women ready to move beyond that pain can't do it alone. "It is one of the most difficult areas to be free from and be healed from that I have ever worked with," she said, with survivors facing everything from depression and anxiety to dissociative disorders and addiction. Though promotional materials for "Shelter from the Storm" bill it as [sic] limited to 10 women, Tortoriello said she is flexible. "I'm not going to limit God," she said, explaining she expects "an unlimited number" of people to attend Friday's orientation. "He can handle getting more facilitators," and meeting the other needs if more women respond. And though the group itself is limited to women -- the study's author emphasizes that many if not most survivors would not feel safe in a mixed-gender setting -- Tortoriello said her husband will be available to help men who have experienced sexual abuse. People who know someone who could benefit from "Shelter from the Storm" or counseling have to be patient, she said, and not try to coerce him or her into attending the orientation. "Just be there and listen. Your can't try to fix them," she said. Don't give advice. "Listen with compassion and empathy," she said. "Shelter from the Storm" curriculum includes material for a survivor's support person, encouraging him or her to provide acceptance, prayer, honor and validation. "Recovery is a journey that only the recovering person can make," the handout reads. "You are not being asked to go on the journey. You are being asked to be supportive of your friend as he or she goes on the journey. For those who are ready to get help, Tortoriello said, "Shelter" could bring about miracles. "God wants to heal," she said. "He's still in the healing process today." |
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Jones, Melanie (Times Staff Writer). Program seeks to help abuse victims. The Gadsden Times (Gadsden, Alabama), February 22, 2007. |